Randy Suits

FedEX My Love to You

Kochana,
During your short business trips I get extremely lonely for you. Today is one of those days. So I’m going to sit down, write a letter and FedEx my love to you. If I do this, you’ll have my yearnings in twenty-four hours. Though the phone is faster, a written letter exudes more passion. So rather than sending you flowers, I’ll over-night express my affection for you. It won’t be the first time that a man has used FedEx Air in a show of devotion and tenderness. The overnight delivery is an extreme measure that matches the helplessness of a man who misses the woman who is as necessary as the air that he breathes. Tomorrow, I’m going to FedEx Air a long stemmed red rose to you. I can see you using a drinking glass for that stemmed rose if that’s all you can find. The day after tomorrow, I’ll surprise you with tickets for the concert we want to attend. The night before you leave, you’ll receive an invitation, delivered by FedEx Air, to a family reunion, just you and me. Please RSVP back with your response by overnight delivery. FedEx Air is the best overnight delivery service to carry the tokens of our love. So tonight as you’re reading this seemingly unnecessary note, I humbly submit to you that you are the center of my universe and I have chosen FedEx Air for the overnight delivery of our important communications. All my communications with you are important enough to send FedEx Air even though it is not practical. This man needs you, this man loves you and this man can’t wait until you get home. That’s why I had to FedEx My love to you.

Kochany